How to Love Better

Title:  How to Love Better By Pastor Lohn Johnson

1 Corinthians 13:1   1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.  2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.  3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

My dear friends in Christ, In this text St. Paul sends his famous "love talk" to his Christian friends in Corinth. So many couples chose these words  of Paul for their wedding day. Many have cherished these words of love. But our love is so often like this:  A young man went off to college. At every break, he would bring home a different girlfriend. His father was amused.   But every time, his mother would say something. "Son, she's beautiful. But is she perhaps a little too somber?" Or with the next, Mom would eventually wonder, "I don't know. She's so particular." And then with another, "She sure strikes me as too mousy for you, my dear."   At last the young man brought one woman who was so bubbly and bright! But he had a sneaking suspicion. He thought, "No wonder I'm head over heels. She's just like Mom!" What a hit she made with the mom. Mom was thrilled with the girl.   Wouldn't you know it? His father took the young man aside. "Son, I've always kept my opinion to myself. As long as you're happy, I'll love this girl. But I can't put my finger on it: there's just something about her I don't like!"  That’s a picture of how imperfect our love is.   Well, I confess. I have more to learn about the ways of love. I bet you do too? I bet each of us aims to be more loving.

I. And to us Paul promises "And I will show you a still more excellent way," (12:31b). Yes, Paul, show us the way of love! Paul will Show us: How TO BE BETTER LOVERS!

A. And we respond: "If only this… If only that, then I would be a better lover to the people in my life.  Yes,  if only . . ."

1. It seems that Paul gives us his own list, his "if only" list.

a. He thinks: "If only, I could speak all their languages.” b. If only I could preach with prophetic power, c. If only I could move the mountains, with faith jump the furthest sea. d. If only I were more willing to give all I've got. To give myself just like my loving Lord, like Jesus did!"

2. It’s as if he thinks, then he could be a better lover.  Obviously all this cut close to Paul's heart because Paul was always seeking to be a better lover of the people in the churches like that in Corinth.

B. So we have to ask: What more do you need to be a better lover?

1. And again we think: “If only. If only.”   a. But Paul knew he’s loved by God even though he is not a good lover.   b. What about you? None of us are good lovers but there’s Good news! You have been loved. Unconditionally, undeservedly, you are loved by God!  God has poured out his love on you. You are filled to brimming over with love from God.

2. Did God love Paul because of what Paul did for God? No! God loved Paul from the start, before Paul did anything. Paul hated Jesus, was bent on wiping out Christ's people, when God's love shone down on Paul. a. Why does God love you? It’s not because of you.  God loves you because of himself! " Purely, perfectly, finally, and forever, God loves you!   b. You see that “if only” prayer is really so silly. "God, if only you would change me, then I would love more. If only you would make me more like Jesus, then I would love like Jesus." Really?  Maybe our prayer should be: "God, you have loved me. You have baptized me, made me Christ's. Lord, help me to believe your love. You give me all your heart. Help me to live your love. Move me to love from your heart!"

B. So the answer to: What more do you need to be a better lover?  Jesus! Only Jesus can make you a better lover.

1. But look again at Paul's words. Does Paul really describe anyone you know? Who speaks the language opening every heart? Who speaks a word sweeter than angels, speaks with such love? Who?

a. Only Jesus!  Only He knows all God's mysteries. With mountain-moving faith, he gives all he has. He gives himself, body and soul, to God's furious hellfire, giving himself for his loved ones! Jesus is love.   b. Did you hear about the fellow who played the part of Jesus in the church Passion play? Shouldering that heavy cross, stumbling up the church's long driveway, he felt so honored. When his friends from church played their parts and jeered his "Jesus," the actor was near tears.

Then he heard the voice of his neighbor, one with whom he had issues. This neighbor joined the jeers, tossing out silly lines. "You think you're so big, 'Jesus.' Too busy to mow your lawn?" The jibes went on and on, even turning personal, nasty. "Your house looks ugly. Almost as ugly as your daughter!"   "Jesus" had had enough. Throwing down the cross, he stomped over to that neighbor. Hot words, were exchanged. The Passion play ground to a halt. Everybody tried to smooth things out.   Afterwards, the director told that "Jesus," "Tomorrow night, we'll have to let your stand-in play the Lord." The poor man was so embarrassed. Heartsick, he begged, "Please, I can do this."   Sure enough, the next night, his neighbor came back for round 2. Again that neighbor shouted Angry and mean words! You could see "Jesus," red-faced, struggling under that cross. But the neighbor kept dishing it out. "And don't get me started on your momma!"   His teeth clenched, "Jesus" cocked his head and fixed his stare on his tormentor. "I'll deal with you after the resurrection!"  So again he failed to love.   Is that our Jesus? No! But all our nastiness has hit his heart. And he carries our sin clear to the grave. He rises, lives, and loves us still today!  But we can’t be better lovers like Jesus.  We can’t love like Jesus as that actor playing Jesus proved.

II. So now we’ve got to ask:  From where can you get more, better love?

A. Paul's words so beautifully describe love. Does he describe any of us?

1. Here's a scary exercise. Try to repeat Paul's words, but substitute your name for the word love in vv 4-7, like this: "Name is patient and kind; name does not envy or boast; name is not arrogant or rude. Name does not insist on its own way; name is not irritable or resentful; name does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Name bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."

a. Ouch! The words stick in my throat. Thank you for not laughing, and booing.   b. My love fails. My heart goes dry. I am painfully aware that I need to be a better lover!

2. Do Paul's words describe you? No! Does Paul's portrait of love really depict anyone?  Again only Jesus.

a. Jesus is patient. Has he never said, "I forgave you once. But no more"? b. Jesus is kind. He's always saying, "Are you stuck? I'll help!" c. Jesus does not envy. He could say, "Only I am perfect. Why should I consider you?"  But He didn’t. d. Jesus doesn't boast. Imagine this ridiculous picture!  Jesus is at the throne, bragging, "Father, see me. I am perfect; I am love!" In truth, Jesus is at the throne pleading, "Father, see these wounds you gave them to me for them. Forgive them, guard them, guide them!" e. Jesus is not arrogant or rude, does not insist on his own way. Gladly He gives himself into the hands of his God, he begs, "Father, not what I want. Your will be done!" f. Jesus is not irritable or resentful. He does not get angry at wrongdoing done against him. Gentle as a lamb, he takes up the cross for all the wrongs we do. g. Jesus rejoices with the truth. His resurrection shouts the truth that He truly loves you! h. Jesus "bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" (v 7). All that his Father promises—Jesus makes it come true for you. And truly Jesus "never ends" (v 8).

B. So the Answer to the question: From where can you get more, better love? Is nowhere but Jesus!

1. And now through faith He makes us like Him.

a. For we know where love comes from. Jesus loves us! You've got God's word on it. "So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love" (v 13). Now in Him we can love with such a love that it spills over to those in our lives who do not yet know Jesus.  Isn't that why God has brought us together in this church family? He loves for us to love one another.   b. God has given us each different abilities. You have your unique experiences. And so we each make our unique contribution.

2. Faith holds on to Jesus, faith takes to heart his love. Hope looks forward to all Jesus so lovingly gives us. So why is love the greatest?

a. Only love nails God's heart. John, in his First Letter, says flat out, "God is love." "Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God" (1 Jn 4:8, 7).   b. He brings us to love like this: Two brothers were so excited to be going to the country to church camp. For these boys, this would be their first week away from home, free of the big city. Their mother had scraped together her every last penny, walked down to the Goodwill thrift store, and purchased a couple of big old suitcases, camp clothes, used shoes, and even some bags of candy.   So the brothers stood in the excited crowd in the church parking lot when they heard the bad news. "The big bus broke. And this little bus can't fit everybody. Maybe somebody will somehow be able to come back tomorrow for the rest of you. But today, only one boy from each family can board this bus. One boy, one bag, that's all."   The little brother about burst into tears. "That's okay," said the older one, "you go."   "No! You go," he blubbered. "I can't go without you anyway."   "Follow me," said the big brother. He quickly led his brother behind the church. He placed his brother's packed bag there with the garbage cans. He opened his own luggage and dumped all his treasures into the dumpster. He put down the suitcase on the ground and whispered, "Keep quiet, and get in!" Stooping over, straining, he balanced that big bag on his back. He trudged on up the bus steps.  He loved his brother so much he carried him on his back.

CONCLUSION: Similarly Jesus would take on his back all the weight of our sin to get you to paradise.  So now we know the depths of his love?  You and I are fully known by Jesus, the Jesus who fully loves us!  It is He who fills us with His love so it can overflow to others.